dimecres, de febrer 15, 2006
The Secret World of Teachers
At some point in education's long history teachers earned the reputation of being destined to remain single forever. Everybody remembers having a teacher they thought would never get married or experience the joys of romance. Television programs play off this common misconception. Bart Simpson's teacher for instance, or the teacher from Van Halen's "Hot for Teacher' video (no way was she a one man, or little boy, woman). One could claim television employs this idea, that teachers will be single for the rest of their days, to portray teachers as oddballs. It makes sense that Hollywood thinks this way, since from up on top of the precipice that show business sits upon it must seem insane to choose to be a teacher.
Isn't there a saying that goes, "those who can't do, teach," or something like that, right? The education should find that down right insulting since it practically portrays them as having a high level of worthlessness. On the opposite end of that double edged insult is the fact that the rest of us must be idiots for letting a bunch of people who can't do something teach us how to do said thing.
Putting those last two paragraphs you come out with the impression that teachers are a failure and no one will ever want to marry them. If you did come to that conclusion you wouldn't be the first. Apparently someone molded their entire business plan off of the idea that teachers have "relationship" issues.
There is a growing trend among teachers to have get-togethers at a fellow teachers house and buy sex toys/products from a dealer. These functions are sometimes called passion parties, or girls night out (or in). The whole event isn't much different than those infamous Tupperware parties; in fact the main difference is
usually just the shape the plastic was molded into.
On multiple occasions women teachers I have met or am acquainted with have mentioned how they felt obliged to go to these work functions their colleagues threw for the sole purpose of fitting in. In fact I have even brought this up with friends who are teachers and they become astonished that I knew they went to these types of parties. That's right, they weren't appalled that I was asking them if they bought tools to pleasure themselves with, which is what one would guess. Somehow, in this case, my audacity is hidden behind my knowledge of the sleazy education underworld. It must take a leap of faith to discuss, let alone purchase, sex toys alongside the people you work with.
Can you imagine your teachers at these parties? I'm not going to take that any further, just focus on the awkwardness of that before moving to the repulsion.
Obviously at some point someone thought about it and saw the dollar bills at the end of that tunnel. The visionary then decided to become a dildo dealer and exploit the plethora of women who would never be able to get a man, otherwise known as teachers. Who ever this person is they should get one of those "men of genius" beer ads made for them (even if it was a woman). I am sure that there are a lot more A's being given out thanks to that entrepreneurial spirit.
This whole passion party thing has actually become a big industry, and by no means is it exclusive to the teaching profession. It just seems to have found a niche by becoming way for female teachers to bond. As far as I can tell male teachers are not having glory hole or circle jerk parties all the time. I'm actually trying to avoid investigating that one just in case they do.
Overheard over a plastic replica of Goliath's 5th largest appendage:
Jennifer - You had Eric Perez last year didn't you?
Christy - Awww, is he one of yours now?
Jennifer - (nodding) You can tell can't you?
Christy - It's the eyes, hun. Can you believe Carina has one of these?
Jennifer - Actually yeah I can, she seems the type. I just could never get used to it being blue
Christy - It won't be like your eyes will be open anyways, will they! Haha
Jennifer - (laughs)
Christy - Oh yeah, getting back to that brat. You're just going to have to pick on him until he cries. That's what I did.
Jennifer - Hmmmmm, really? It's that easy?
This news puts an ironic twist to the oft-repeated saw that our teachers are drastically underpaid. Things can't be too shabby if there are sufficient funds to purchase so many "pleasure aids"... Also interesting is that despite all the extra socialization time, what with being off duty for an entire season plus ending the work day several hours before non-teachers, so many educators still find it difficult to meet the significant other(s) who would render these Pocket Rocket parties unecessary...
Maybe this is why they unionized.
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Isn't there a saying that goes, "those who can't do, teach," or something like that, right? The education should find that down right insulting since it practically portrays them as having a high level of worthlessness. On the opposite end of that double edged insult is the fact that the rest of us must be idiots for letting a bunch of people who can't do something teach us how to do said thing.Putting those last two paragraphs you come out with the impression that teachers are a failure and no one will ever want to marry them. If you did come to that conclusion you wouldn't be the first. Apparently someone molded their entire business plan off of the idea that teachers have "relationship" issues.
There is a growing trend among teachers to have get-togethers at a fellow teachers house and buy sex toys/products from a dealer. These functions are sometimes called passion parties, or girls night out (or in). The whole event isn't much different than those infamous Tupperware parties; in fact the main difference is
usually just the shape the plastic was molded into.On multiple occasions women teachers I have met or am acquainted with have mentioned how they felt obliged to go to these work functions their colleagues threw for the sole purpose of fitting in. In fact I have even brought this up with friends who are teachers and they become astonished that I knew they went to these types of parties. That's right, they weren't appalled that I was asking them if they bought tools to pleasure themselves with, which is what one would guess. Somehow, in this case, my audacity is hidden behind my knowledge of the sleazy education underworld. It must take a leap of faith to discuss, let alone purchase, sex toys alongside the people you work with.
Can you imagine your teachers at these parties? I'm not going to take that any further, just focus on the awkwardness of that before moving to the repulsion.
Obviously at some point someone thought about it and saw the dollar bills at the end of that tunnel. The visionary then decided to become a dildo dealer and exploit the plethora of women who would never be able to get a man, otherwise known as teachers. Who ever this person is they should get one of those "men of genius" beer ads made for them (even if it was a woman). I am sure that there are a lot more A's being given out thanks to that entrepreneurial spirit.
This whole passion party thing has actually become a big industry, and by no means is it exclusive to the teaching profession. It just seems to have found a niche by becoming way for female teachers to bond. As far as I can tell male teachers are not having glory hole or circle jerk parties all the time. I'm actually trying to avoid investigating that one just in case they do.
Overheard over a plastic replica of Goliath's 5th largest appendage:
Jennifer - You had Eric Perez last year didn't you?
Christy - Awww, is he one of yours now?
Jennifer - (nodding) You can tell can't you?
Christy - It's the eyes, hun. Can you believe Carina has one of these?
Jennifer - Actually yeah I can, she seems the type. I just could never get used to it being blue
Christy - It won't be like your eyes will be open anyways, will they! Haha
Jennifer - (laughs)
Christy - Oh yeah, getting back to that brat. You're just going to have to pick on him until he cries. That's what I did.
Jennifer - Hmmmmm, really? It's that easy?
This news puts an ironic twist to the oft-repeated saw that our teachers are drastically underpaid. Things can't be too shabby if there are sufficient funds to purchase so many "pleasure aids"... Also interesting is that despite all the extra socialization time, what with being off duty for an entire season plus ending the work day several hours before non-teachers, so many educators still find it difficult to meet the significant other(s) who would render these Pocket Rocket parties unecessary...
Maybe this is why they unionized.
Publica un comentari a l'entrada